Everyone meet Shane!
By now most of you will know Shane is my brother and I have had the pleasure of doing all of his coaching since Day 1.
Looking back just over a decade ago to the headspace that kid on the left was in still scares the shit outta me!
3 years ago this week a journey began & a transformation started, but the true beginning was a few years before then.
The photo on the left was taken in Manhattan just over 10 years ago. We hadn’t entered the selfie generation so this is literally the only photo I have of myself at that time. You’re not exactly snap happy when you’re in the physical or mental state I am here! I’m mid-late teens & weighing in under 7 stone. I remember this trip so clearly because I have a distinct memory of being in a restaurant called Bubba Gump Shrimp in Times Square with the family and had a plate of food put in front of me with a portion size that filled me with so much fear & anxiety! I haven’t a clue what I did with that plate… knowing me I probably pretended to feel ill so I didn’t have to eat it. In your teens you’re supposed to devour everything in sight but not me. Despite being older and a little bit wiser I still hesitate to say those words beginning with ‘A’ & ‘B’, hell it even feels weird to type eating disorder. And that’s just not fucking right. There’s such a stigma attached to this especially if you’re a guy. Cancer is a horrible physical disease that needs a tonne of chemotherapy, it’s something that has to be cut out of you. This is a different beast. It manifests in your head & takes over your body. You’re no longer in control. Outside voices get shut off and evil inner ones take over. And as sad as it is to say food is the enemy. You must avoid at all costs letting it into your body and if you give in it must be purged.
I strongly believe the reason people don’t achieve their goals, be them in the gym or some other area of life is because their ‘WHY?’ isn’t strong enough!
Ask a dude why he wants to go to the gym? Oh it’s because I wanna get big, gain muscle, look like my favourite YouTuber & pull loads of girls!
That’s cool but it’s such a hollow reason! Why do you want to get big, why do you want to gain muscle, deep down what does it mean to you to achieve these goals? The same goes for girls, you wanna lose fat, you wanna get strong, you want an ass like your favourite Instagram? What would it mean to you to achieve that? What is your WHY?
What’s my ‘WHY’? Why do I think I’ve been able to get in good shape & get strong for my size despite crazy food & stomach issues? Because I was bullied verbally & phyically in school. Because my body was ravaged by an eating disorder. Because mentally I was in a disgustingly dark place. Because I had no social or romantic life because of that. Because I remember being in school and not eating the tiny lunch I’d brought, because I remember my bony ass sticking into the biology bench, because I remember the effort of dragging myself up the marble staircase in school & how fucked I was after. Because I remember being terrified of food and that’s a really fucked up place to be in. I remember what it feels like to be mentally & physically gone & I never wanna feel like that again. Although the stomach is still permanently damaged from what I’ve been through training has built me back up, not corrected but improved my relationship with food & helped to take the mind out of that dangerously dark place!
That’s what I think about right before a big lift. Anyway, the butterfly’s are real on this post so while I go breath into a brown paper bag for a few you go figure out your WHY & you’ll be unstoppable!
Power – Positivity – Progress